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When kids are struggling with behaviour, it can wear you down. You try things, they don’t work, and after a while it just feels like you’re guessing. Most parents I talk to have already tried a lot—reward systems, consequences, talking it through, ignoring it, tightening things up. Some of it helps for a bit, then it stops. Or it works with one situation and not another. That’s usually the point where people start to feel stuck. You don’t have to keep guessing. And you don’t

I understand how overwhelming ABA jargon can feel, so I’ve broken one core concept from the Positive Systems Approach into a simple, usable framework you can apply today. Observe. Hypothesize. Test an environmental change. Think of it like tuning a radio: first you listen, then you guess which dial needs adjustment, and finally you turn it slightly to see if the signal clears. Why this matters: PSA adapts ABA into a strengths-based, system-wide model that teaches coping skill

There are moments, as a psychologist, when something you read simply resonates at a deeper level—not because it is new, but because it so clearly reflects what you have long understood to be true. That was my experience reading the recent  New York Times  article on how neurodivergent individuals are finding meaningful and rewarding careers working within inclusive restaurant environments.  The New York Times piece (April 5, 2026) explores a growing movement within the restau

When we face challenging behaviours, it can feel like trying to solve a puzzle with missing pieces. You might wonder, Why does this happen? or How can I help without making things worse? I’ve been there, and I know how overwhelming it can be. But what if there was a way to look at behaviour not as a problem to fix, but as part of a bigger system that we can gently guide toward positive change? That’s where the Positive Systems Approach to Behaviour comes in—a compassionate

By: Dr. Bob Carey In a recent Globe & Mail opinion piece (Nov. 10, 2025), Rob Whitley and Erin O’Toole highlight a sobering reality: men and boys in Canada carry a disproportionate share of the country’s mental health burden. They point to statistics showing that roughly  three out of four suicide deaths in Canada are among males , and that male suicide rates remain nearly  three times the rate for females . These trends extend to other harms too—such as higher rates of toxic

By Dr. Bob Carey The Impact of ADHD on Adolescents Recently, I read a longitudinal study titled "Identifying Candidate Mediators Linking ADHD Symptoms and Internalising Problems in Adolescence." Researchers Murray, Dryburgh, and Sonuga-Barke explored the complex pathways that lead from ADHD symptoms to internalizing issues like anxiety and depression during the critical teenage years. The study found that social difficulties, emotional dysregulation, and academic struggles me

by Dr. Bob Carey   There’s a moment many parents don’t talk about.  It doesn’t happen during the diagnosis. It doesn’t happen in the therapy sessions. It happens quietly, over time—when life begins to reorganize itself around one child’s needs, and everything else slowly shifts in response.  This has to do with the significant amount of stress that having a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder can have on the family system. In a recent article published in the Globe & Mail (“

If you’ve ever found yourself locked in a battle of wills with your teenager, you’ll probably recognize this pattern right away. Things escalate quickly, the same arguments repeat, and before you know it, you’re reacting in ways that don’t feel like your best self. Then comes the frustration—“Why does this keep happening?”—and often, quietly underneath that, a bit of self-doubt. I was reading a recent piece in The Globe and Mail that captured this dynamic in a way that I thin

By Dr. Bob Carey Recently I came across a study by Roby, O’Connell, Griffin and their colleagues ( Roby, E., O’Connell, L.K., Griffin, M.G. et al. Promoting early relational health and resilience in pediatric primary care: a qualitative study. Pediatr Res (2026) on promoting early relational health in pediatric primary care. What struck me most was how closely the findings align with what many of us working in behaviour and developmental psychology have been saying for year

When we think about changing behaviour, especially in children who face challenges, it can feel like trying to solve a complex puzzle. You might wonder, Why does this behaviour keep happening? or How can I help create lasting change? I’ve been there, and I know how overwhelming it can be. But understanding the frameworks behind behaviour change can be a game-changer. Today, I want to walk you through the fascinating world of behaviour change models, focusing on systemic app

When I read a recent Instagram post noting that they are introducing a feature that alerts parents when their teen repeatedly searches for suicide or self-harm content, I had two immediate reactions. The first was relief. Any effort to interrupt suffering earlier is worth paying attention to. The second was caution. An alert is only as helpful as the response that follows it. In my career as a Clinical Psychologist, I have learned that behaviour—especially the kind that scare

When you’re navigating the complex world of challenging behaviors in children, finding the right support can feel like searching for a lighthouse in a foggy sea. You want guidance that’s not only expert but also accessible and compassionate. This is where remote family consultants come into play, offering a bridge between professional insight and your everyday life. Let’s explore how these consultants can become a vital part of your journey. Why Consider Remote Family Consult

Over the past month, several compelling articles and research findings have emerged in the world of child psychology—many of them circling around a common theme: children are carrying more emotional weight than ever before, and it’s showing up in their behaviour. But what stands out in this new wave of research is not just the rising rates of distress, but the growing acknowledgment that behaviour cannot be understood apart from the systems surrounding the child. In other wor

Over the past several weeks, I have run across a wave of new reports and research studies that have been released on the state of children’s and adolescents’ mental health. The themes are familiar by now—rising anxiety, more school refusal, emotional dysregulation, and the continuing strain on families trying to navigate it all. But as concerning as these headlines may be, they also point to something deeply important, something that resonates strongly with the Positive Syste

As a psychologist, I often find that the most profound insights come not from looking deeper into a child’s mind, but by stepping back to view the entire world they inhabit. A recent report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) (see source link below) provides a sobering example of why this systemic perspective is more critical now than ever. The Findings: A System Under Strain The CAMH article highlights a distressing trend: emergency department visits for m

For many parents, school meetings feel less like collaboration and more like combat. Whether it’s an IEP meeting, a behaviour review, or a “we need to talk about your child” phone call, the emotional stakes are high. Parents often arrive prepared to defend their child, while schools arrive prepared to manage behaviour. That mismatch can quickly turn conversations adversarial. In  What if It’s Not Just the Behaviour? , I introduce the  Positive Systems Approach (PSA)  as a way

by Dr. Bob Carey In recent years, parenting coaching has emerged as a powerful alternative to traditional advice-driven or compliance-based models of child-rearing.  I recently read an excellent article in the Journal of Health Service Psychology (2025, Vol 51, Issue 3), by Dr. Antonio F. Pagan entitled “ Discipline, Love and Authenticity:  A Psychologist’s Guide to Coaching Parents” .  This article on parenting coaching offers a timely and evidence-informed overview of how c

Yesterday,  The New York Times  published an important opinion article documenting an unsettling trend: the resurgence of the “R-word,” a slur long understood as hurtful and demeaning to people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. ( https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/26/us/r-word-slur-disability.html ) The authors (Dan Barry and Sonia A. Rao, Jan. 26, 2026) describe how this word — once broadly regarded as taboo — is now reappearing across social media, public comme

Positive re-direction becomes significantly more effective when viewed through the lens presented in my book: What If It’s Not Just the Behaviour? , where behaviour is understood not as a simple matter of choice, but as an expression of nervous system state. From this perspective, challenging behavior is frequently a manifestation of stress activation rather than intentional noncompliance. When the brain is operating outside the window of tolerance, access to executive functi

Learning is not a single event—it is a dynamic, ongoing process shaped by relationships, routines, expectations, and emotional safety. While many schools focus on curriculum delivery and academic outcomes, research and practice increasingly show that how students experience learning environments is just as important as what they learn. One powerful way to strengthen learning environments is through the use of positive learning methods supported by a Positive Systems Framework