New research on parental stress, emotional regulation, and the invisible demands of family life offers important insights into how we can better support children's mental health. Most parents recognize those occasions when family life seems to become more difficult than it should be. A child who ordinarily manages the morning routine becomes increasingly resistant to getting ready for school. A parent who is usually patient finds themselves becoming frustrated over seemingly

When we think about managing challenging behaviours, it’s easy to get caught up in quick fixes or reactive strategies. But what if there was a way to look deeper, to understand the whole system around the behaviour? That’s where the Positive Systems Approach comes in. It’s like stepping back and seeing the entire forest, not just the trees. This approach invites us to explore how every part of a child’s environment interacts and influences their behaviour, helping us create l

Understanding Why Lasting Behavioural Change Begins with Relationships, Expectations, and Environments By Dr. Bob Carey There is a question I have returned to many times throughout my career, particularly when working with children, adults with developmental disabilities, and families struggling with persistent behavioural or emotional difficulties. Why is it that an individual can function reasonably well in one environment, yet experience considerable difficulty in another,

What new research on nature, social connection, and well-being tells us about the importance of looking beyond the individual. By Dr. Bob Carey We have become very accustomed to thinking about mental health in terms of what is happening within the individual. When someone is experiencing anxiety, depression, stress, or difficulty coping with everyday life, our attention quite naturally turns toward their thoughts, emotions, behaviour, and ability to manage the demands being

New research on parental stress and childhood ADHD raises important questions about how we understand challenging behaviour and why supporting parents may be an essential part of helping children. By Dr. Bob Carey For many parents raising a child with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), everyday family life can become an exhausting series of reminders, negotiations, frustrations, and attempts to keep things moving in the right direction. Getting ready for school

By Dr. Bob Carey New research suggests that the everyday experiences we sometimes overlook may have a much greater influence on children's emotional well-being than we realize. Most parents are familiar with those mornings when everything seems to go wrong. One child cannot find their shoes, another is refusing to get dressed, breakfast has barely been touched, and the clock seems to be moving much faster than everyone else. A parent who began the morning determined to remain

By Dr. Bob Carey There is a point in many conversations about a young person's mental health when someone says, quite reasonably, that the child needs help. Perhaps a teenager has stopped attending school regularly, seems increasingly withdrawn, or no longer enjoys the things that once mattered to them. Parents become concerned, teachers notice changes, and a referral is made. We tend to think of that referral as the beginning of a solution. Yet for some families, it is the b

The Complex Landscape of Parenting There has always been something slightly uncomfortable about how we discuss parenting when a child is struggling. When a young child becomes anxious, aggressive, withdrawn, oppositional, unusually demanding, or difficult to manage, attention often shifts quickly to what the parents should be doing differently. Maybe the parents need to be more consistent. Perhaps they need to set firmer limits or use consequences more effectively. Sometimes

What School Connectedness Can Teach Us About Mental Health and Behaviour Dr. Bob Carey Over the years, one of the things I have learned from working with children and adolescents who experience significant behavioural and mental health difficulties is that it is very easy to become focused on the behaviour itself. When a student is refusing school, becoming increasingly anxious, withdrawing from others, disrupting the classroom, or simply appearing to have lost interest in th

There is something about September that often makes parents and teachers suddenly notice things that may have been much less apparent during the summer. A child who seemed relatively happy and relaxed in July may begin complaining of stomach-aches as soon as school starts. A child who enjoyed spending time with friends may suddenly become reluctant to go to school, while homework becomes a source of conflict, mornings become increasingly difficult, and behaviours that seemed

One of the questions I hear most often from parents and professionals is, “How can we help this person communicate what they need without relying on challenging behaviour?” It is a particularly important question because, in many situations, the behaviour that concerns us most is also the person's most effective means of communicating. A child may scream when they want something, push materials away when a task becomes too difficult, leave the classroom when they feel overwhe

The Changing Landscape of Mental Health A recent article in The Globe and Mail described the experience of a young woman in her twenties living in Fredericton. She earns just under $50,000 a year, which she considers reasonable for her location. However, approximately $500 each month goes toward therapy and medication related to her mental health. She explained that without these supports, she struggles with sleeping, eating properly, and functioning well enough to work. For

by Dr. Bob Carey One of the things I have learned over many years of working with children, families, and professionals is that the hardest part of helping with challenging behaviour is often not figuring out what might work. The greater challenge is helping the adults around the child use those strategies consistently, confidently, and in ways that actually fit into the realities of everyday life. It is entirely possible to develop an excellent behaviour support plan that ma

by Dr. Bob Carey Over the past four decades, I have had the privilege of working with thousands of children, adolescents, and adults whose lives have been affected by developmental disabilities, autism, mental health challenges, acquired brain injuries, and complex behavioural concerns. Throughout those years, I have witnessed significant changes in how psychology and behaviour analysis understand and respond to challenging behaviour. Some of these changes have been driven by

By Dr. Bob Carey There is a question I have been asked countless times over the past four decades. It usually comes from exhausted parents who have reached the end of another difficult day and are searching for something—anything—that might make tomorrow a little easier. "What do I do when my child refuses?" Sometimes the refusal involves homework, sometimes getting dressed in the morning, sometimes going to bed, and sometimes something as simple as turning off a video game.

When you’re navigating the complex world of challenging behaviours in children, it can feel like you’re trying to solve a puzzle without all the pieces. You want to help, but where do you start? How much will it cost to get the right support? These questions often linger in the back of your mind. Today, I want to walk you through the costs involved in Positive Systems Approach consultations, helping you understand what you’re investing in and why it matters. What Is the Cost

When it comes to guiding children through their emotional ups and downs, it often feels like navigating a winding river. Sometimes the current is calm, and other times it’s a rapid that tests your every skill. I’ve learned that managing child behaviour positively is less about control and more about connection. It’s about understanding the why behind the actions and gently steering towards better choices. So, how do we do this effectively? Let’s explore some positive child be

by Dr. Bob Carey One of the greatest risks in working with children is believing that we already know why they behave the way they do. A child who cannot sit still is often labeled as having ADHD. A student who refuses to complete schoolwork may be described as oppositional or unmotivated. Another child who withdraws from classmates might be viewed as shy, anxious, or socially awkward. While these descriptions may contain elements of truth, they often do not tell the whole s

When parents come in for a consult about their child's emotional wellbeing, the conversations typically focus on the factors most people naturally think about. They talk about family relationships, friendships, school experiences, learning challenges, anxiety, stress, behaviour, and self-esteem. Occasionally they discuss sleep, exercise, or the impact of technology. What rarely comes up, at least initially, is nutrition. Yet nutrition is becoming an increasingly important pa

The Alarming Statistics Over the past several years, researchers have documented a troubling increase in emotional distress among adolescent girls. The statistics are difficult to ignore. According to the most recent Youth Risk Behavior Survey from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), four in ten high school students reported persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness during the previous year. Among girls, the numbers are even more concerning, with n