Subscribe to get exclusive updates on when new Blogs are published!

When you’re navigating the complex world of challenging behaviors in children, finding the right support can feel like searching for a lighthouse in a foggy sea. You want guidance that’s not only expert but also accessible and compassionate. This is where remote family consultants come into play, offering a bridge between professional insight and your everyday life. Let’s explore how these consultants can become a vital part of your journey. Why Consider Remote Family Consult

Over the past month, several compelling articles and research findings have emerged in the world of child psychology—many of them circling around a common theme: children are carrying more emotional weight than ever before, and it’s showing up in their behaviour. But what stands out in this new wave of research is not just the rising rates of distress, but the growing acknowledgment that behaviour cannot be understood apart from the systems surrounding the child. In other wor

Over the past several weeks, I have run across a wave of new reports and research studies that have been released on the state of children’s and adolescents’ mental health. The themes are familiar by now—rising anxiety, more school refusal, emotional dysregulation, and the continuing strain on families trying to navigate it all. But as concerning as these headlines may be, they also point to something deeply important, something that resonates strongly with the Positive Syste

As a psychologist, I often find that the most profound insights come not from looking deeper into a child’s mind, but by stepping back to view the entire world they inhabit. A recent report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) (see source link below) provides a sobering example of why this systemic perspective is more critical now than ever. The Findings: A System Under Strain The CAMH article highlights a distressing trend: emergency department visits for m

For many parents, school meetings feel less like collaboration and more like combat. Whether it’s an IEP meeting, a behaviour review, or a “we need to talk about your child” phone call, the emotional stakes are high. Parents often arrive prepared to defend their child, while schools arrive prepared to manage behaviour. That mismatch can quickly turn conversations adversarial. In  What if It’s Not Just the Behaviour? , I introduce the  Positive Systems Approach (PSA)  as a way

by Dr. Bob Carey In recent years, parenting coaching has emerged as a powerful alternative to traditional advice-driven or compliance-based models of child-rearing.  I recently read an excellent article in the Journal of Health Service Psychology (2025, Vol 51, Issue 3), by Dr. Antonio F. Pagan entitled “ Discipline, Love and Authenticity:  A Psychologist’s Guide to Coaching Parents” .  This article on parenting coaching offers a timely and evidence-informed overview of how c

Yesterday,  The New York Times  published an important opinion article documenting an unsettling trend: the resurgence of the “R-word,” a slur long understood as hurtful and demeaning to people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. ( https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/26/us/r-word-slur-disability.html ) The authors (Dan Barry and Sonia A. Rao, Jan. 26, 2026) describe how this word — once broadly regarded as taboo — is now reappearing across social media, public comme

Positive re-direction becomes significantly more effective when viewed through the lens presented in my book: What If It’s Not Just the Behaviour? , where behaviour is understood not as a simple matter of choice, but as an expression of nervous system state. From this perspective, challenging behavior is frequently a manifestation of stress activation rather than intentional noncompliance. When the brain is operating outside the window of tolerance, access to executive functi

Learning is not a single event—it is a dynamic, ongoing process shaped by relationships, routines, expectations, and emotional safety. While many schools focus on curriculum delivery and academic outcomes, research and practice increasingly show that how students experience learning environments is just as important as what they learn. One powerful way to strengthen learning environments is through the use of positive learning methods supported by a Positive Systems Framework

A Positive Systems Analysis of Jeremiah Introduction: A Child Caught in Failing Systems Jeremiah is a 10-year-old Neurodivergent boy with prior diagnoses of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD Without Accompanying Intellectual Impairment) and Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) who has been experiencing escalating behavioural challenges across home and school environments. His presentation includes multiple daily outbursts characterized by screaming, physical aggression

Behaviour management is a critical aspect of education, healthcare, and social services. However, implementing behaviour management interventions without embedding them within a Positive Systems Approach can be not only ineffective but also unethical. Drawing upon insights from the books What if it's Not Just the Behaviour? and Managing Disruptive Behaviours with a Positive Systems Approach , this post explores why behaviour management must be part of a broader, positive fr

As parents, we've all been there: a sudden meltdown in the grocery store, a defiant "NO!" that echoes through the house, or a sibling squabble that escalates from playful to painful in seconds. In these moments, it's easy to feel frustrated, overwhelmed, or even to label our child as "naughty" or "stubborn." But what if we told you there's a different way to look at these challenging behaviors? What if, instead of defiance, you saw a brain system in overdrive, a little "secur

Why Behaviour Charts Only Go So Far Behaviour charts are built on a simple idea: reward the behaviour you want, reduce the behaviour you don’t. In the short term, this can lead to quick compliance. A child might clean their room, follow instructions, or hold it together long enough to earn a reward. The problem is what charts don’t address. They don’t teach emotional regulation. They don’t build coping skills. They don’t explain why a child is struggling in the first place.

Learning is a lifelong journey that shapes how we grow, adapt, and succeed. Whether in school, the workplace, or personal development, adopting effective learning methods can transform the experience and outcomes. One powerful way to enhance learning is by embracing positive learning strategies that focus on building strengths, fostering motivation, and creating supportive environments. This blog post explores how these strategies work, why they matter, and how you can apply

Parenting a child with ADHD can be both rewarding and challenging. Children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder often require unique approaches to help them thrive. This guide offers practical advice and actionable strategies to support your child’s growth, improve family dynamics, and foster a positive environment. Understanding ADHD and Its Impact on Parenting ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by symptoms such as inattention, hyperactivity, and i

Parents often ask me a simple question: “Why does my child fall apart the moment things don’t go as planned?” The truth is not simple, but the solution can be. Children thrive when life feels predictable. When the rules shift, routines wobble, or adults respond differently from one moment to the next, anxiety jumps and behaviour follows. In the Positive Systems Approach (PSA), consistency is more than a parenting technique. It’s the engine that makes every other strategy work

Beyond time-outs, children need emotional skills they can use for life—skills like calming their bodies, naming their feelings, and solving problems when things go wrong. A Positive Systems Approach (PSA) focuses on teaching these skills directly, rather than just reacting to behaviour in the moment.​ From Behaviour Control to Skill Building Traditional behaviour management often focuses on stopping outbursts quickly, but it may not teach children what to do instead when big

Ethan’s behavior was causing significant concerns at home and daycare. When told “no” or asked to wait, he would scream, bite himself, or collapse on the floor in frustration. In social situations like soccer practice, he often hid behind his father’s leg, crying uncontrollably. At home, simple requests like “time to clean up” could spiral into chaos. Sarah described it perfectly: “We felt like nothing worked — we tried being supportive as well as timeouts, threats, even rea

Parenting a child whose behaviour disrupts daily life can feel like an unending cycle of exhaustion, guilt, and second-guessing. Yet, as Dr. Bob Carey illustrates in What if it’s Not Just the Behaviour? , the Positive Systems Approach (PSA) transforms these struggles into opportunities for connection and growth. PSA integrates the precision of Applied Behaviour Analysis (ABA) with the holistic lens of systems theory and the heart of compassionate care. It views behaviour as c

In today’s complex world, organizations and individuals alike face challenges that require more than quick fixes. To truly transform outcomes, a deeper, more holistic approach is necessary. This is where systematic positive strategies come into play. These strategies focus on understanding and improving the entire system through careful consideration of root causes of issues and conducting detailed analsyis of the whole system rather than isolated parts, leading to sustainabl